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Bible Study: Fever Pt 3, Outro (Part 2)

[Note: This series originally started as a project on Reddit. You can find an explanation of what Bible Study is all about here.]

We have arrived here at the end of Fever 3, and we end our time engaging in a sacred writing practice, which means we journal for 10 minutes about a random line chosen by Siri.

Next week, we will have a special edition bible study where we spend some time with the Deja Vu music video and see how it connects back to the Fever 3 Diary.

03: sacred practice

GD: What's our sacred practice today? Writing?

Bobby: It is

GD: I was given line 12

Bobby: "A shadow of despair fell on their faces."

GD:  See you in 10?

[Ten minutes later]

Bobby: Well

GD: Went well you say?

Bobby: That would be a first

GD: Well would you like to share first or would you like me? I didn't talk about this line at all. So I have that going for mine.

Bobby: I also mostly didn't. I had to keep reigning myself in. You can share. I'm going to update the transcript


GD's Sacred Writing Practice:

This doesn’t have anything to do with anything, but the first thing I thought of when I read this was that my son the other day was very interested in why people associate red with being angry. He had recently developed pink eye, and we went to the store to get his medicine. They had these very pretty, tiny pink roses. When he saw them, he said he wanted them because they matched his eye, and he thought they’d help make him calm. He said that he finds the color pink calming. Then he began to question why people find red to be an evil color because it’s one of his favorite colors. 

It reminded me of this unit I used to have to teach. During our unit on metaphor, the district had shoved in a bit about color. How color could be a metaphor for certain things, which isn’t technically true, but it does make a sort of theoretical sense if you think about it long enough. Anyways, it was the word shadow that made me think of this. 

The idea that shadows are scary is sort of… universal? I think? It feels almost like an evolutionary imperative to be afraid of what is in the shadows. There’s nothing more scary than the things we can’t see because the most frightening place on earth is inside an overactive imagination. And so it made me think about this phrasing–a shadow of despair.

The thing about shadows is that they are also pretty easy to remove. The smallest light, and the shadow is gone–perhaps a new shadow created, but once a shadow has been illuminated, you can no longer fear what might have been there. I think that’s what’s interesting about the end of this page. The shadow does disappear quickly because of that spark of hope that Yeosang is still out there. The light that gets rid of those shadows is hope. 

ATEEZ plays a lot with light and darkness in their lore. And one of the things I come back to so often is this line in Diana Biller’s book, The Brightest Star in Paris. It’s set after a war and one of the characters talks about how this ballerina’s dancing on the corner of the street gave the people beauty and hope when there was nothing else but despair. 

And in a lot of ways, I think that’s what so much of ATEEZ’s story is about. The power of art to give people hope because hope is the light that gets rid of the shadows.


Bobby: RE: color as metaphor: it's interesting bc while it can be technically true, it also entirely depends on the person's background because different cultures associate different colors with different things

GD: Right--I was telling my son that I didn't' think red was associated with evil and anger everywhere

Bobby: The light vs. darkness is so obvious now that you've pointed it out

So obvious in fact that I don't think I have anything additional to add, lol

But also, as will be made clear when you read mine, I'm not functioning at full capacity

GD: Well, I can't say that I'm firing on all cylinders either, but the point is we tried

I think I do have more ateez thoughts about light and darkness, but they're out of reach

Bobby: Although I am reminded all of a sudden that I once told someone that misplaced hope is a very frightening thing

GD: I agree with you. I'm very much the type of person who doesn't like getting their hopes up


Bobby's Sacred Writing Practice

Well, we were talking about this a bit earlier, about how hard it would be for the other members who moved ahead while Yeo was left behind. There would be the feeling of helplessness and of guilt. Hongjoong seems to immediately take the blame. 

I have to wonder if Halateez had something to do with this. I don’t mean that they brought them to strictland in the first place or even the sending of the drone. But I wonder if Halateez knew that Yeosang would be captured. Knew that he MUST be captured. And so they did something to make certain that it would happen. Like perhaps that was something else on their to do list. 

If Halateez can circle back on their own timeline, why wouldn’t they just do something to save themselves? And if they keep, at different points in the future, traveling back to the same time, would that mean there could be infinite cromers present at the same time? 

No. There has to be some sort of rule to keep things like that from happening. Like if this is a OneTeez situation and they know that freeing the Halateez version of themselves is futile.

I don’t know but that has nothing to do with the line.

On the surface, we can take from this how much they mean to each other. Funny considering they’d already quit on each other willingly before. But this is obviously different. They are worried, at this moment, that Yeosang is dead. That’s not the same as being too distracted to send a text. 

They’re just kids really. Maybe little baby 20-somethings. The timeline, as always, is unclear. They are unprepared to deal with this, really to deal with all that Halateez is asking them to do.


GD: It's interesting the idea that him being dead is very different than him just living his life doing something else


But like, I hadn't really thought about it

Bobby: In practice it's the same thing--Yeo is not part of their lives

But if he's just doing his thing separate from them there's still that hope

GD: I think there would also be some comfort in the idea of 'well, at least he's happy'

What's that dumb quote people love to throw around?

'if you love something let it go'

Misguided, but understandable

The whole fever story feels like people who are unprepared, and honestly, that's the feeling of the music too. And I'm interested to see how that changes once we get to the world. because it does change, and again, I think that change is reflected in the music

Bobby: The World changes genre entirely

It's no longer a coming of age sort of story--it's an action thriller top to bottom

And, yeah, we see that in the music as well

GD: I just think that's really fantastic

Like, it's just so... well done

It's all so on point

Anyways, Ateez is the best

Bobby: And also REALLY begs the question--where do we go from here?

GD: I'm very curious to whether or not there will be an epilogue

Bobby: Hard to say. Two times isn't exactly a pattern

GD: In the past the epilogue has always come out just right after the last one.. but like you say.. two isn't a pattern

Bobby: We know they won't overlap with the babies at least. Will they finish their whole tour before the next album? Who can say

All of KQ can say

GD: I truly don't think we will have dates until after Coachella

But anyways

Shall we close it out


04: closing

GD: A prayer for all of Ateez?

Bobby: All I want is a summer tour

That's for me

GD: My true prayer

Bobby: For Ateez. . .

The strength to keep hoping

GD: I will pray that they hold on to their hope.

Bobby: Hope is work

GD: Good to end on the same page

Hope can be very tiring

Bobby: Here's the thing

Just real quick

I need tickets before Coachella bc I'm not interested in fighting with people who can drop $2k on a music festival who just happened to see Ateez and want to go again

Converted locals

GD: I agree entirely

Bobby: Okay. Focus.


GD: Hmmmm

What about eternal sunshine? feels too.. something, but it's our last page and I do feel like we should close out with a part 3 song

Bobby: Taken of course

Pt 3 songs left are all about you, rocky, and flid

GD: Rocky? I'm not against it

I almost said a minute ago that something I appreciate is how quickly they put their hope into action

Bobby: Rocky it is

Patron saints?

GD: My patron saint for this week is Hongjoong for his creative energy

Bobby: So last week the children were actual monsters. I'm generally very laid back, don't have a lot of discipline issues for whatever reason--I don't know how to explain to people what I'm doing and why it works bc idk. But this past week I had to pull multiple children into the hallway and yell at them, which I NEVER do.

So I need someone who can keep it together but also keep the week pleasant for everyone

GD: I know the boy I'd pick

Bobby: That's why I'm asking

GD: Seonghwa

Bobby: See I was wondering if Seonghwa would be too soft but I think that the members respect him enough to know when not to cross the line

GD: Alternatively


As dance captain

Bobby: Yes, he was also a choice. But he is also a causer of chaos when he wants to

Hwa I think is the choice

I feel like we forgot something

GD: The mental murder board

Bobby: LOL

The part we just regularly skip now

GD: Well perhaps it should come before the praise and the prayer

Post sacred practice my brain is not up to the task of making connections

Bobby: I think we've assumed that the practice would uncover some truths

GD: Bold of us

Bobby: It generally doesn't though I don't think

Well let's just continue to not make any connections

GD: Connections will be for when we watch DV and ES

Which is exciting

We can do that over spring break

Bobby: Winter Break

GD: Yes, that one

Shall we rosary then

Bobby: Yes

GD: 8 makes

Bobby: 1 team

GD: Be the light

Bobby: Halazia

GD: Perfect

Bobby: Going to go continue to not care about the super bowl

GD: Forgot it was on


Hard to believe we've now deeply analyzed 3 of the diarys, and I still feel no closer to The Way, The Truth, and The Light. Perhaps one day.

Thank you for joining us, and do let us know if you've made any connections! Until next week!


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